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- Narrator: And a traumatized Steve Holt needs a father.
- Steve Holt: I've made a huge mistake.
- GOB: I know the feeling - I had you. I'm your father Steve Holt. I can't hide from it anymore.
- Holt: [to GOB] I'll never forget this - Dad.
- GOB: [begins to cry] I will. [pulls forget-me-now from his pocket and takes it] I will.
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- Narrator: GOB had been a pageant judge for years.
- GOB: You cannot believe what it does for your sex life.
- Michael: I don't want to hear it.
- GOB: I don't want to say it -- First place chick is hot, but has an attitude; doesn't date magicians. Second place is someone weird usually, like a Chinese girl or a geologist. But third place, although a little bit plain has super-low self-esteem, so I step in and, uh... lay her crown upon my sweet head.
- Michael: Have I missed this euphemism?
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- Gob: I've got this Christian girlfriend now and she's trying to get me to be a better man and reconnect with my son and I'm trying to get her to renounce God and bleep me and I just want to prove to her that I'm worth it.
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